The next three characteristics of children raised in emotionally barren homes are: (please see the previous post for the source of this list)Have difficulty following a project through from beginning to end. Have difficulty following a project through from beginning to end Lie when it would be just as easy to tell the truth. Judge …
Category: healing
From 4 Roles to 3 Rules
Parents are emotionally unavailable because of an issue in their life which the spouse wants resolved. For example, a mother works full time plus. She is successful in her job but works nienty hours a week. Everyone wants to see more of Mom. If she’d just work less, everything would be better. A parent may …
Big Families and Small Ones: What About the Roles?
Over the last four weeks we have examined the four roles children assume when they are raised in a home with an emotionally absent parent. Psychology seems to have a predilection for models of four; in this case the hero, rebel, lost child and mascot. In healthy families, children’s behavior flows across all four roles. …
The Mascot: Using Humor to Cover Pain
The last of the four roles is the Mascot. As mentioned, this learned behavior uses humor and fun to offset the stress of the family situation. It looks like fun but all is not happiness and roses, for the humor is used to cover a dark side. The mascot lives in buried fear. The child …
The Lost Child: Finding The Way Back from Emptiness
A family where the parents are emotionally absent (whatever the reasons) leaves the children to fend for themselves emotionally. In learning to cope in a difficult situation with a child’s maturity and knowledge, the siblings often adopt one of four roles to cope with the emotional emptiness of the home. The Lost Child believes that …