Category: Abuse

The Problem Child – It’s Not All Bad

In every family with an emotionally absent parent, the children learn and adopt one of four roles to deal with the stress and tension in the family.  These roles are the hero, rebel or scapegoat, mascot and lost child. The previous two posts talked about the Hero – the child who learned to handle the …

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The Family Hero – It’s Not All Good

The Hero or Responsible Child is the first of the learned behaviors of children who grow up with an emotionally absent parent.  When one parent is not providing emotional support to the family and the other parent is focused on that absence, the children are often left to fend on their own. Often the oldest, …

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How Children Cope – 4 Learned Roles for Stress Management

Many decades ago, counselors saw an interesting outcome from treatment of alcoholics (most of whom were male):  their clients seemed to do better when the spouse attended a week of treatment geared specifically for them.  Proven repeatedly, the conclusion was clear:  when the spouse of the alcoholic worked on herself, he recovered more quickly and more strongly. …

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