The second role in this discussion is the rebel, discussed in some detail here. But there is another point of view about the role of this troubled child and that is that they play the scapegoat for the family. From this perspective, this child takes on the family’s problems and acts them out, to ensure …
Category: Abuse
The Problem Child – It’s Not All Bad
In every family with an emotionally absent parent, the children learn and adopt one of four roles to deal with the stress and tension in the family. These roles are the hero, rebel or scapegoat, mascot and lost child. The previous two posts talked about the Hero – the child who learned to handle the …
The Family Hero – It’s Not All Good
The Hero or Responsible Child is the first of the learned behaviors of children who grow up with an emotionally absent parent. When one parent is not providing emotional support to the family and the other parent is focused on that absence, the children are often left to fend on their own. Often the oldest, …
How Children Cope – 4 Learned Roles for Stress Management
Many decades ago, counselors saw an interesting outcome from treatment of alcoholics (most of whom were male): their clients seemed to do better when the spouse attended a week of treatment geared specifically for them. Proven repeatedly, the conclusion was clear: when the spouse of the alcoholic worked on herself, he recovered more quickly and more strongly. …
9 Steps to Finding a Therapist
If you have decided that your life could be enhanced, then perhaps you’ve decided to find a therapist. One of the questions I’m asked most often is “How do I find a good therapist?” Isn’t it ironic that finding a therapist is so difficult? Reminds me of finding a good mate or becoming a good …