The last of the four roles to discuss is “The Mascot”. This role is usually taken on by one of the two youngest children in a home with an emotionally absent parent. When confronted with the stress in the family, this child tries to lighten the mood, usually through humor. They may also become the …
The Lost Child: Finding The Way Back from Emptiness
A family where the parents are emotionally absent (whatever the reasons) leaves the children to fend for themselves emotionally. In learning to cope in a difficult situation with a child’s maturity and knowledge, the siblings often adopt one of four roles to cope with the emotional emptiness of the home. The Lost Child believes that …
The Lost Child: Invisible and Unheard
The third of the four roles is the Lost Child. Remember, in a family with an emotionally absent parent, the other parent is focused on the ‘missing’ one. So no one is focused on the children. As a result of their emotional absence, the children learn to cope by adopting certain behavior styles. Unfortunately, these …
Rebels and Scapegoats: How do They Heal?
The second role in this discussion is the rebel, discussed in some detail here. But there is another point of view about the role of this troubled child and that is that they play the scapegoat for the family. From this perspective, this child takes on the family’s problems and acts them out, to ensure …
The Problem Child – It’s Not All Bad
In every family with an emotionally absent parent, the children learn and adopt one of four roles to deal with the stress and tension in the family. These roles are the hero, rebel or scapegoat, mascot and lost child. The previous two posts talked about the Hero – the child who learned to handle the …